Randome ramblings from a depressed soul.

I can't believe that i let myself fall so far to someone that i want so bad. she is so young. so gorgeous. so much the person that i want. How did this happen? Please explain it to me. why did it happe. such a gorgeous girl. such a beautiful woman. when will it all make sense. when will it all come back together. when will the life that i wish i had, that which i hold dear, return to me. when will her presence breathe the spark of life back into my body, give me the glow, the presence, the fire inside that will rejuvinate my deminished, demented and delirious soul? Breath guidance within my feeble frame. Will my presence, my power, my sheer love for her bring the power back to her. will her motherhood bring that which we wish and hold dearest together. will she open up to me and bring the likes of which i have not known?
childish dreams of a forgotten reality that i no longer have the means to bring about. Foolishness. I have the power to create any realm that i wish, any power that i want, any means that i can concieve, i can create.